Possible Scenario:
So you've written your novel/blog/op-ed/essay, and you've sent it off to an editor (with no small degree of trepidation).
You get your sample edit or beta reading or first round of edits back. You are wary but stoked to see what they think of your pride and joy that you've labored over, sweating bullets and shedding copious tears.
Maybe without even reading the proposal, report, or cover letter, you open the Word document and ... WHAT?!
Your beautiful manuscript text is covered in markings and the margins are full of comments and suggestions!
As you scan through the feedback you might feel overwhelmed and be tempted to despair.
Don't go there!
So you've written your novel/blog/op-ed/essay, and you've sent it off to an editor (with no small degree of trepidation).
You get your sample edit or beta reading or first round of edits back. You are wary but stoked to see what they think of your pride and joy that you've labored over, sweating bullets and shedding copious tears.
Maybe without even reading the proposal, report, or cover letter, you open the Word document and ... WHAT?!
Your beautiful manuscript text is covered in markings and the margins are full of comments and suggestions!
As you scan through the feedback you might feel overwhelmed and be tempted to despair.
Don't go there!
Pause.
Breathe. Stretch.
Drink a glass of water.
Breathe some more. Stretch again.
Breathe. Stretch.
Drink a glass of water.
Breathe some more. Stretch again.
Let the shock fade.
Then go back to carefully read and absorb their actual reactions and recommendations. Let the comments sink in, and try to see through their eyes.
Resist the instinct to react defensively or offensively.
Your editor doesn't hate your writing. They are, in fact, amazed by your creativity and impressed with what is obviously a huge accomplishment.
Eventually - after more breathing, water drinking, and calmer re-reading - you'll be able to see where the feedback rightly points out places or phrases that probably could use some tweaking. The critique asks pertinent plot questions and suggests places that seem inconsistent or where you could be clearer. The assessment honestly reflects reactions you might expect to get from readers.
This is what you needed - what you asked for - what you are paying them to do.
Then go back to carefully read and absorb their actual reactions and recommendations. Let the comments sink in, and try to see through their eyes.
Resist the instinct to react defensively or offensively.
Your editor doesn't hate your writing. They are, in fact, amazed by your creativity and impressed with what is obviously a huge accomplishment.
Eventually - after more breathing, water drinking, and calmer re-reading - you'll be able to see where the feedback rightly points out places or phrases that probably could use some tweaking. The critique asks pertinent plot questions and suggests places that seem inconsistent or where you could be clearer. The assessment honestly reflects reactions you might expect to get from readers.
This is what you needed - what you asked for - what you are paying them to do.
If you have experienced anything like the above scenario, you are not alone.
Making ourselves vulnerable by inviting critique is an act of incredible bravery.
And there is no doubt that assessments of our writing can feel very personal. It is difficult to separate our selves from our work.
But the critique is not of you or even of your talent.
It may be an honest assessment of what stage you are in as you learn skills and develop techniques to become a better writer. We all have to start somewhere.
Or the critique may be focused on helping you polish this particular piece. No one's early draft can become a bestseller. A WIP will require many drafts to reach a state of refinement where your thoughts and intentions are communicated clearly to the reader.
However, even though we know we need and have asked for help - most of us aren't able to throw off our defensive armor completely or for long. In fact, we may be all too familiar with being told we aren't good enough. We may expect to receive a blow in a spot that is already bruised, so we instinctively raise our shields or maybe even try to beat them to the punch.
Making ourselves vulnerable by inviting critique is an act of incredible bravery.
And there is no doubt that assessments of our writing can feel very personal. It is difficult to separate our selves from our work.
But the critique is not of you or even of your talent.
It may be an honest assessment of what stage you are in as you learn skills and develop techniques to become a better writer. We all have to start somewhere.
Or the critique may be focused on helping you polish this particular piece. No one's early draft can become a bestseller. A WIP will require many drafts to reach a state of refinement where your thoughts and intentions are communicated clearly to the reader.
However, even though we know we need and have asked for help - most of us aren't able to throw off our defensive armor completely or for long. In fact, we may be all too familiar with being told we aren't good enough. We may expect to receive a blow in a spot that is already bruised, so we instinctively raise our shields or maybe even try to beat them to the punch.
If you struggle to deal with constructive correction or suggestions for improving your work or skills, maybe you could try to frame the experience differently. Think of it like this:
A good editor is like a good massage therapist.
Maybe you had a bad experience in the past, but you've heard good things about this one. You know you need some adjustment, so you make an appointment.
Or maybe you've been coming to this practitioner for a while but still have a hard time relaxing into the experience, even though you know it's for your own good.
Picture the scene:
The massage therapist invites you into a safe environment they've created very deliberately. It's warm and welcoming, and you begin to feel comfortable. They ask if you have any specific concerns or if they should focus on any particular spots. They continue to ask questions to get to know you while warming up your muscles and helping your relax.
Their experienced and sensitive hands search out and find those tight, strained, knotted, or misaligned places. And they alternate between soothing and digging into your muscles - often finding WAY more issues than you had any idea were there.
This can certainly cause discomfort in the short run. And if you remain tense, defensive and resistant, very little will be accomplished, and you'll leave in not much better shape than you came.
Likewise, you won't experience any lasting benefit from an entirely pleasant, soothing experience on the massage table. Sure it feels nice now, but it isn't helping to unknot your muscles.
They may recommend stretches or exercises or adjustments in your posture to help you grow stronger and avoid these issues in future. If you don't heed this advice or view it as criticism of you as a person, you will have wasted your money and time and will not progress or improve.
HOWEVER, their goal is to ease chronic discomfort and enhance mobility. If you trust them, if you can relax and surrender to the process, working with them - your body will benefit from the attention. After some time, maybe some training or exercise, you'll be able to move more freely and without pain.
A good editor is like a good massage therapist.
Maybe you had a bad experience in the past, but you've heard good things about this one. You know you need some adjustment, so you make an appointment.
Or maybe you've been coming to this practitioner for a while but still have a hard time relaxing into the experience, even though you know it's for your own good.
Picture the scene:
The massage therapist invites you into a safe environment they've created very deliberately. It's warm and welcoming, and you begin to feel comfortable. They ask if you have any specific concerns or if they should focus on any particular spots. They continue to ask questions to get to know you while warming up your muscles and helping your relax.
Their experienced and sensitive hands search out and find those tight, strained, knotted, or misaligned places. And they alternate between soothing and digging into your muscles - often finding WAY more issues than you had any idea were there.
This can certainly cause discomfort in the short run. And if you remain tense, defensive and resistant, very little will be accomplished, and you'll leave in not much better shape than you came.
Likewise, you won't experience any lasting benefit from an entirely pleasant, soothing experience on the massage table. Sure it feels nice now, but it isn't helping to unknot your muscles.
They may recommend stretches or exercises or adjustments in your posture to help you grow stronger and avoid these issues in future. If you don't heed this advice or view it as criticism of you as a person, you will have wasted your money and time and will not progress or improve.
HOWEVER, their goal is to ease chronic discomfort and enhance mobility. If you trust them, if you can relax and surrender to the process, working with them - your body will benefit from the attention. After some time, maybe some training or exercise, you'll be able to move more freely and without pain.
So you get where I'm going with this. I think it's a pretty apt analogy!
I hope you can step back from identifying personally with your writing and relax into the process and apply yourself to improving your technique and skills with your trusted editor.
And visit them regularly. The better they know your work, your voice, and your concerns, the more help they will be as you polish and prepare your work for publication.
I hope you can step back from identifying personally with your writing and relax into the process and apply yourself to improving your technique and skills with your trusted editor.
And visit them regularly. The better they know your work, your voice, and your concerns, the more help they will be as you polish and prepare your work for publication.
“I loved how personable Kate was during our chats and emails, making it feel like I was talking to a good friend, and she was always open to explaining her suggestions if I didn’t understand something. She has this way of still being friendly while offering critiques, so I never felt like I was being made fun of for missing things. I felt like Kate wanted what was best for my story and really put her heart into helping in any way she could.”
- Author Michelle A. Marie
